Ask a Mistress a (bdsm based) question.

[Mistress Adore]

Mmm i hope this goes the way I intend it to

Just as the title says, ask a Mistress a question, let us answer them, lets see if we can get some understanding of the different ways we all play, think, explain ourselves.
I guess it will either fly or sink, no harm is posting though

No flaming ! no using this as an excuse to be nasty ! no baiting or digs please (I also find it rather sad I even had to add this last piece).

So anyone have any questions ?

[subtle]

Good idea, MA. This question crosses my mind every so often -

When a client sees you on a regular basis, do you have an idea of where you hope to take them in time? Does it differ completely from one individual to the next, or are there certain common goals or aspirations you have for them?

I guess this is a question about the extent to which you feel there's a philosophy underlying what you do. Nowadays it's probably the first question I would want to ask a Mistress I was interested in seeing.

Which might sound a bit weird, I guess.

[Mistress Adore]

Great question

Each one of my gents are individual, they may enjoy similar things to some others, they may not, but the they all do have one thing in common, they are able to open themselves up and be honest with me. The journey they are on is their own and the road we go down can not be walked in the same way with another.

There is a huge philosophical aspect to my style of play, I have been told often am very different to other Mistresses, how true this is of course I do not know, I work alone so do not actually see how many other Mistress hold sessions, or interact with their subs.

I do not have a set plan, i never know what I am going to do with them on the day I have booked to see them (its true) I see how they are on the day, how they are feeling, what has been going on in their lives and get a feel for what I think they need at that time. The only set goals I have for them is to build them up, have them feel comfortable with themselves and enjoy who they are, even if for some this is only when in session.

Often during chats one of mine will comment about something another has wrote on my forum they have tried and the way they talk about it will decide if i will try it with them one day. I try to be as fluid as possible and encourage mine to never say never, though of course a hard limit is just that.

If I have just waffled and not answered your question in the way you thought, feel free to tell me lol, I can waffle a bit

I would be interested in hearing other Mistress views on this also.

[Mistress Susannah]

Originally Posted by subtle

When a client sees you on a regular basis, do you have an idea of where you hope to take them in time? Does it differ completely from one individual to the next, or are there certain common goals or aspirations you have for them?

I guess this is a question about the extent to which you feel there's a philosophy underlying what you do. Nowadays it's probably the first question I would want to ask a Mistress I was interested in seeing.

Bit of all of this, if I'm honest.

I've often been described as someone who is quite "in the moment" so to a certain extent many of my sessions are too. Sometimes there is a certain amount of planning, sometimes they're planned to the enth degree and sometimes there is no planning at all and I decide what we do moment to moment.

If I'm with a regular is there an end goal? Um.... perhaps.... not one I can really put my finger on. I want to train them to be better for me and for other women and that's an ongoing exploration. There are mini goals if we're working up to a particular new activity or something that would be on their "soft limits" list. All my regulars are incredibly obedient and wonderful, but I'd never say they've reached there goals and are all uber slaves! Training is an ongoing and ever evolving process.

The one goal and aspiration I have for both myself and my submissives is that they are happy in their submission to me and I'm happy in my Dominance to them. I want to always feel like it's a meeting of minds and that we both feel like we're "coming home" when we are in the session room.

I'm not sure if I have a philosophy that can be written down exactly.... but that final paragraph above is the nearest I can get to it.

[subtle]

Originally Posted by Mistress Adore

Great question

Each one of my gents are individual, they may enjoy similar things, to some others, they may not, but the they all do have one thing in common, they are able to open themselves up and be honest with me. The journey they are on is their own and the road we go down can not be walked in the same way with another.

There is a huge philosophical aspect to my style of play, i have been told often i am very different to other Mistresses, how true this is of course i do not know, i work alone so do not actually see how many other Mistress hold sessions, or interact with their subs.

I do not have a set plan, i never know what i am going to do with them on the day i have booked to see them (its true) i see how they are on the day, how they are feeling, what has been going on in their lives and get a feel for what i think they need at that time. The only set goals i have for them is to build them up, have them feel comfortable with themselves and enjoy who they are, even if for some this is only when in session.

Often during chats one of mine will comment about something another has wrote on my forum they have tried and the way they talk about it will decide if i will try it with them one day. I try to be as fluid as possible and encourage mine to never say never, though of course a hard limit is just that.

If i have just waffled and not answered your question in the way you thought, feel free to tell me lol, i can waffle a bit

I would be interested in hearing other Mistress views on this also.

Thanks, that makes a lot of sense, and didn't sound at all like waffle. I like the combination of being fluid on the day but still having some general, positive goals in the background. Some days it's good to be pushed, and some days it's good to take things a bit more gently.

The person we're journeying with is probably more important than the destination.

[subtle]

Originally Posted by Mistress Susannah

Bit of all of this, if I'm honest.

I've often been described as someone who is quite "in the moment" so to a certain extent many of my sessions are too. Sometimes there is a certain amount of planning, sometimes they're planned to the enth degree and sometimes there is no planning at all and I decide what we do moment to moment.

If I'm with a regular is there an end goal? Um.... perhaps.... not one I can really put my finger on. I want to train them to be better for me and for other women and that's an ongoing exploration. There are mini goals if we're working up to a particular new activity or something that would be on their "soft limits" list. All my regulars are incredibly obedient and wonderful, but I'd never say they've reached there goals and are all uber slaves! Training is an ongoing and ever evolving process.

The one goal and aspiration I have for both myself and my submissives is that they are happy in their submission to me and I'm happy in my Dominance to them. I want to always feel like it's a meeting of minds and that we both feel like we're "coming home" when we are in the session room.

I'm not sure if I have a philosophy that can be written down exactly.... but that final paragraph above is the nearest I can get to it.

Would you anticipate that if your subs are better for you and for other women they might end up being just generally a bit better too?

"Coming home" is a lovely sensation indeed. Wouldn't mind feeling that again some day

[Mistress Adore]

Originally Posted by subtle

Would you anticipate that if your subs are better for you and for other women they might end up being just generally a bit better too?

"Coming home" is a lovely sensation indeed. Wouldn't mind feeling that again some day

Can I also answer this question, yes I have been told more than once I have helped make them "want to be a better person".

Its also a lovely feeling.

[Mistress Susannah]

Originally Posted by subtle

Would you anticipate that if your subs are better for you and for other women they might end up being just generally a bit better too?

At its best, it should be life enriching and soul building.... for both parties.

Great idea for a thread MA



I am going to pin this so we don't lose sight of it and so as many people as possible get the chance to ask something

And a question from myself

Do you get days when you just don't feel like it? I think most of us do get those - well, I did when I was working anyway

How hard is it to motivate yourself to session in those circumstances?