UKM - Seeing a Mistress vs seeing a therapist - Page 6 - UK

Slutty Rimmer · 10-11-2018, 10:33

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ogden McNit

Yawn, get over yourself Slutty.

FYI, no presumptions or generalisations of what they think were necessary. All nine men LITERALLY went on national television and told us!

Say what ??? You LITERALLY select and categorise and record the opinions of aged white men that appear on Question Time, and then later screen capture and photo-shop their images into a collage ?

I either think you have a consuming obsession and too much free time on your hands in which to indulge it, or I don’t believe you.

I’m sorry Budgie old man, I just can’t believe you.

My reflected symmetrical p*ss take of nine leftie and right-on young black women with accompanying niger name would rightly be assessed as racist and ageist and sexist. You seem OK with propogating this, whereas I most certainly am not.

You need to take a look in your mirror. The one with a little bell attached that rattles whenever you peck it.

Kind Regards,
The Fireman.

10-11-2018, 11:14

Quote:

Originally Posted by Slutty Rimmer

Say what ??? You LITERALLY select and categorise and record the opinions of aged white men that appear on Question Time, and then later screen capture and photo-shop their images into a collage ?

I either think you have a consuming obesesion and too much free time on your hands in which to indulge it, or I don’t believe you.

I’m sorry Budgie old man, I just can’t believe you.

My reflcted symmetrical p*ss take of nine leftie and right-on young black women with accompanying niger name would rightly be assessed as racist and ageist and sexist. You seem OK with propogating this, whereas I most certainly am not.

You need to take a look in your mirror. The one with a little bell attached that rattles whenever you peck it.

Kind Regards,
The Fireman.

You've lost me now Slutty. Believe what you want, I don't care.

As much as I'd love to discuss this further and try and understand what's behind your anger, I have a busy weekend ahead.

Thought I'd leave you with this though;

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=uLlv_aZjHXc

Slutty Rimmer · 10-11-2018, 11:29

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ogden McNit

You've lost me now Slutty. Believe what you want, I don't care.

But you do care though...don’t you do.

You are right to care because we should all care about discrimination and sexism and racism, or at least all just accept it. There are no half measures.

Enjoy your weekend. I’m servicing an old boiler and fiddling around with TAPs today...then it’s time to raise my blood pressure with Shirl the girl !!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ogden McNit

Thought I'd leave you with this though;

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=uLlv_aZjHXc

Monty Python ? You just don’t get inventive genius like that on the BBC anymore.

Kind Regards,
The Fireman.

geordiesouth · 10-11-2018, 12:29

One of the guys I drink with sometimes is nicknamed “The argument” directly related to that sketch

He is one of those (and there are many) blokes who is absolutely normal (or as normal any one can be) until he has that one pint too many. Then anything and everything gets perceived as an argument.
Must be odd to those on the outside to see a group of men begin to ignore him

11-11-2018, 13:57

Quote:

Originally Posted by reefknot

It is quite possible that by visiting a Pro Domme it is letting out inner tensions / desires that a partner cannot or will not address; the exercising these inner tensions could you could see it as taking a stress point out of you life and therefore out of your relationship and hence make that a better relationship or it could be just happy cheating in a relationship.

Thanks reefy, good post. An interesting discussion was nearly in danger of breaking out just before the cry-bully got his PC panties in a twist!

I think the above hits the nail on the head and is as close as you can get to the hub of the issue before individual morality comes into play, which is where it inevitably starts to get thorny.

Apologies if any of my posts came across as judgemental or deliberately inflammatory. I was partly playing devil's advocate in an attempt to liven things up a bit. The board has been a bit quiet of late.

geordiesouth · 11-11-2018, 14:33

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ogden McNit

Thanks reefy, good post. An interesting discussion was nearly in danger of breaking out just before the cry-bully got his PC panties in a twist!

I think the above hits the nail on the head and is as close as you can get to the hub of the issue before individual morality comes into play, which is where it inevitably starts to get thorny.

Apologies if any of my posts came across as judgemental or deliberately inflammatory. I was partly playing devil's advocate in an attempt to liven things up a bit. The board has been a bit quiet of late.

I love it

Slutty Rimmer · 11-11-2018, 14:33

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ogden McNit

Thanks reefy, good post. An interesting discussion was nearly in danger of breaking out just before the cry-bully got his PC panties in a twist!

Apologies if any of my posts came across as judgemental or deliberately inflammatory. I was partly playing devil's advocate in an attempt to liven things up a bit. The board has been a bit quiet of late.

You do yourself proud.

Immature name calling (again), then insincere apology, then lame excuses.

The triple piffle !

Kind Regards,
The Fireman

Slutty Rimmer · 13-11-2018, 16:51

Quote:

Originally Posted by reefknot

It is quite possible that by visiting a Pro Domme it is letting out inner tensions / desires that a partner cannot or will not address; the exercising these inner tensions could you could see it as taking a stress point out of you life and therefore out of your relationship and hence make that a better relationship or it could be just happy cheating in a relationship.

Do you think subs/pets/slaves/masochists/fetishists* generally feel an inner tension within themselves over their desire or ‘need’ to session ? It is often described as such but it is not something I can say I experience to any great degree. The desire for kink has always been there but I have never felt it as a tension that needed resolving, due I suppose in part because I have equally never felt an obligation to conform and so feel no discord. Really plain vanilla sex is fun enough but a little dull and usually in need of a grinding of kink seasoning**.

My presumptions is that most men are kinky to some degree given half the chance and so there should be no inner tension as kink is really the base line rather than the exception. To my mind just straight vanilla is a bit of a kinky fetish in itself. How can anyone hope to keep only that going for a lifetime without losing interest ?

If a partner is unwilling to partake in a splash of kink then what’s wrong with contracting it out to a professional ? You may be endeared and weaned on a partners cooking but that is no reason not to enjoy a good blow at the local curry house once in a while with your pals.

Perhaps this is why the mantra ‘Domination is not Prostitution’ is often slavishly accepted, because it partitions out the guilt of a vanilla cheat looking for ‘the same but with better’ from that of the kinkster looking for something completely different and esoteric. If the lady is seen as part therapist not a prostitute then it is not cheating, is it ? The fact she may be as hot as a rocket with boobs that have their own high tide whenever at the beach is merely a detail.

Kind Regards,
The Fireman.

* Delete as appropriate. I am never sure what the right noun is. I just consider myself a kinky slut.

** What a fuss. I can never see why she always objects so vehemently to either of us wearing a gasmask. It’s just another item of wear for heavens sake. Who’s taking notes anyway ? I also thought they were grotesque at first until I found myself inside one enjoying ‘an ecstasy fumbling’ just before the popper gas. Got to give things a go, haven’t you ?

13-11-2018, 20:40

Quote:

Originally Posted by Slutty Rimmer

If a partner is unwilling to partake in a splash of kink then what’s wrong with contracting it out to a professional ?

Nothing, as long as the same person would be comfortable with their partner looking elsewhere if their needs weren't being met.

And do they seek permission and risk ending the relationship just by asking, or do it secretly and then carry a new stress point of guilt indefinitely? Add the the financial cost if it's regular visits as well. It would certainly weigh on my mind.

At this point you'd have to ask questions about the relationship itself. I think the driving force behind why a lot of men visit Mistresses is often not 'peversion' as such, just a need for excitement and sexual intensity that isn't being fulfilled elsewhere.

So an urge to session is likely a symptom of a wider problem in the relationship.

Or maybe the relationship is perfectly happy and some men are just kinky and need to scratch an itch every now and again. In which case is it fair to enter into a vanilla relationship with someone in the first place knowing this?

Lisal · 13-11-2018, 23:26

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ogden McNit

Or maybe the relationship is perfectly happy and some men are just kinky and need to scratch an itch every now and again. In which case is it fair to enter into a vanilla relationship with someone in the first place knowing this?

That's a valid point of view.

I got married very young (many years ago) and, honestly, I really, really didn't understand my sexuality at the time. I had some confusing "odd" sexual thoughts but was happy with vanilla sex. It was only a few years in that my D/s feelings began to develop. I am not going into the details but, by then, there were issues that meant that my wife was unwell and discussing it was not the best way forward.

Whether or not you agree with that Ogden I was there and I know the situation.

In terms of sessioning - it's a way of life for me now and a big stress buster. Financially, when I was married we had our own incomes (joint paying of bills) and we spent it on what we wanted. No kids, either.

I don't think you can get past the deceit in your own mind - but, apart from that, the marriage worked as well as it could under difficult circumstances. We shouldn't have got married in the first place - we weren't the best match in the world but we did okay and are still on very good terms

It's why I don't like the sweeping statements. They may be true for the majority. For quite a few it's not so easy and these things are often easier from outside looking in than when you are actually in there

10-11-2018, 12:29	#54
geordiesouth Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 7,240 Reputation: 108	One of the guys I drink with sometimes is nicknamed “The argument” directly related to that sketch He is one of those (and there are many) blokes who is absolutely normal (or as normal any one can be) until he has that one pint too many. Then anything and everything gets perceived as an argument. Must be odd to those on the outside to see a group of men begin to ignore him __________________ A girls gotta have somewhere to park her bike.